When most people think about reading to a child, they picture hunkering down with a book while their kid is sitting crisscross-applesauce with the calm and quiet demeanor of a monk. One of my early literacy tips is to reject this vision and commit to reading at your child if necessary.
## What does it mean to read at your child?
I like to think that there are two ways to read to a child: 1.) Reading with them and 2.) reading at them. That picture of a calm and stationary child is what I’d call reading with them. That’s where they are solely engaged in the activity of reading with you. Reading at a child? That’s when you read the book regardless of what the kid is doing.
“> Little pitchers have big ears.”
We all know that kids are almost always listening. They may not always respond or even act like they heard you, but they’re always listening. Reading at a child uses a kid’s natural ability to listen to you to improve their literacy. Studies have shown that children learn more new words by being read to than being spoken to. And your child doesn’t need to sit still and look at the book to benefit.
I’ll say this again: Your child doesn’t have to be looking at the words or picture to get value from you reading to them. Not all children are wired to sit still for that long. And if you really think about it, refusing to read until the kid is sitting still is like punishing them. So, start seeing reading as something that is done every day no matter what. Your kid is jumping off of the back of the sofa? Tell them to knock it off and then keep reading.
Hearing words is how kids expand their vocabularies. So, if that means that you need to pop open a book at meals or during bath-time, go for it. Just to be clear: Kids get more out of the experience if they can see and engage with the illustrations in the book. But, hearing a book is better than not having any exposure to books and stories at all.
Tip: Even if you have a story time wanderer, talk about the illustrations and point the book at them while you read.
What if my child isn’t interested in having books read?
Read at them anyway. I’ll let you in on a secret: A big part of your parenting journey is going to involve having your kids do something they’d prefer not to do. Like bathe, go to school, and eat something other than chicken nuggets. But you make them do it anyway because it’s for their own good. Start treating reading as being as non-negotiable like bathing and going to school. I’m not saying that you have to make a big deal about it, but I am saying that you should make having a book read aloud as part of the normal routine every day.
Tip: If you’re pressed for time, play an audiobook. Chances are, you can stream one for free from your local library.
